


Area of Effect

by RelevantWarlock



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: (i joke i joke), All Magic Comes With a Price, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Burns, Cat Love, Dungeons & Dragons References, During Canon, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Found Family, Guilt, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, M/M, Magic, Major Character Injury, Mighty Nein as Family, Shippy, Sprinkle is Alive AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-01-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:02:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22299772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RelevantWarlock/pseuds/RelevantWarlock
Summary: Some mistakes cost more than others, but you make plenty of them when your best plans are haphazard at best.Or Caleb accidentally hurts someone he cares about and isn't quite sure how to deal with it.
Relationships: Fjord/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 3
Kudos: 124





	1. Verbal, Somatic, Material

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LifeSimplicity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LifeSimplicity/gifts).



> It was bound to happen eventually, so thanks for reading!
> 
> I'm on twitter @plural_j if you wanna see me yell about video games and tabletop games and other weird stuff

Despite being mortified by it, Fjord was kind of surprised that something like it hadn’t happened sooner.

“Alright – next time one of us wants to piss off an enchanter,” Beau yelled as she leaped over a rock, shielding herself from the oncoming frost magic that froze it over, “We should maybe check for the fuckin’ Golem in the basement!”

Said Golem turned out to be a pet project gone haywire, as far as Caleb could tell. Multiple metal plates and pieces meshed together in an incomprehensible design with all sorts of weapons and body parts coming from its metallic mass. The tiny spout at the tip of one of its fingers responsible for the surprisingly effective ice magic pulled back and swung around. The back of its hand bat a raging Yasha out of the way as Nott dashed beneath, firing at its side with her miraculous crossbow. Metal screeched from the creature as the bolts pierced, and a noxious smell billowed from the creature in tendrils of dangerous smoke.

Fjord blocked one arm with the Star Razor as the whirling monstrosity’s eye started to glow. A beam of purplish energy blasted for his side before a flash of light warded it away.

“This thing’s a bit tougher than we thought,” Caduceus mused as his staff glimmered. The Shield of Faith around Fjord gave him just enough to avoid a hit as turned back to give a brief thumbs-up before he readied another slice, carving straight through the things hand.

Jester jumped from a nearby rock, hand glowing a familiar greenish colour as she leaped towards the creature. Her hand pressed into its head as the necrotic energy discharged and bounced backward. Jester was about to jump out of the way just as a fourth (or fifth? How many hands did this thing have?) fist knocked her flying into the ground, bouncing back a couple of feet before she struggled to her feet.

Her eyes glowed a vicious blue for a moment – before she started yelling at the creature in a voice they didn’t hear often. A massive blast of cold air flashed from her tiefling form and slammed into the creature.

“Alright, I may be crazy, but this _thing isn’t fucking dying!”_ Nott yelled just as she landed next to Caleb and Beau.

The field was a mess. Scorch marks and ice hand in hand as the crossed the cavern with its reign of destruction. Its many hands scuffed at the marks around them as the Mighty Nein reassessed. So far, all their magic, all their attacks seemed superficial at best, but Caleb saw the smoke in the air, saw the creature’s erratic movements, and in his head a sharp wave of cunning had him set to go.

“I think this should handle it,” he muttered, accent thick as he carefully moved away from the rock with his hands already covered in soot and sulfur.

“I think it runs off something explosive.”

“Oh, hell yes,” Beau nodded rapidly as she figured out what he was going for, “just wait for the right timing before- “

And Caleb saw it. In a few seconds, several things happened. The familiar bead of flame flickered to life in his hand and soared towards the creature’s chest, his mind already pictured the explosion of flame that would engulf the creature and melt him in the process. With its chest wide open and no other arms or tools to block it, one shot was all they needed.

He let his hands go, the flame started to stretch outward in slow motion as he saw the Fireball finish his task.

But right when it was beyond his control, Fjord blocked another hand as it knocked him right into the center of Caleb’s spell.

“Fjord! –“

The Fireball burst. White-hot flame incinerated the center of the cavern. Caleb’s world slowed down for a second as his hands ached with phantom pain and his heartbeat stopped. All he could see was the heat of the flame, not caring if it singed his hair or the rest of him. His hands dropped and knees buckled as not a second later the fire was gone.

The metallic monstrosity before them seemed to have lost its form. Whatever spark of life inside it had vanished as its parts had molded and melted together. Small fires still caught onto the end pieces of metal as the smoke trailing from it was inky black, and highly toxic if the suffocating smell was anything to go by.

And Fjord was at the center. His sword holding him up on one knee as he struggled upward. His skin was darkened and grey in places armor and body charred as he looked up for one second. His body shook from the strain – his yellow eyes looked towards Caleb for one moment.

And Caleb felt no anger or resentment from the eyes – only confusion. But more than enough for Caleb to sink deep into the tar of his overwhelming guilt in just one moment.

Fjord’s body wavered for a moment. The Star Razor flashed away into sparkles of starlight as he gave in to the pain and exhaustion and collapsed to the ground.


	2. Tanks, Healers, Damage Dealers

Caleb waited at the door. He was cross-legged in the hallway of the Xorhaus with his thumbs twiddling carefully as Frumpkin ran around in circles in front of him – either as a distraction or just a reflection of his mental state. It all seemed far too familiar to him as he stared at his hands, and the bandages around them and thought about how once upon a time he’d done exactly that. Back before the Nein. Back before Caleb.

Back when his own hands were turned against what he cared about as weapons of the Empire.

“Caleb,” Nott nudged his knee.

He glanced up blankly. His hair was disheveled, and he still smelled of the fumes of the dead construct. There was a faraway look in his eyes like he was staring at a horizon in search of a sun that wouldn’t rise in this land of darkness.

The Nein had been good about it. They always were.

_“He’s going to be fine, Caleb,” Caduceus offered his usual dopey grin, “‘Specially with Jester and I on the case.”_

_A pause as Beau carried Fjord under one shoulder, Jester with the other. Her hands already at his side and eyes glowing the pinkish hue the Traveller’s power often took on. She hadn’t said anything yet, which made Caleb want to reach inside himself and pull out his stomach._

Sure enough, by the time they’d made it back home, Fjord looked less like a burn victim and more like his normal green self.

Even if he hadn’t woken up quite yet.

“Caleb, why don’t we go eat something, hmm?” Nott nudged him again, and Caleb nodded only vaguely in response.

He was in the kitchen a moment later. He was going through the motions, mostly, unable to sluice the gunk from his brain. The dark clouds that loved replaying Fjord going up in flames over and over and over- “

Water splashed him in the face, and Caleb sputtered for a moment. He looked, up seeing Nott glaring at him with something halfway between love and frustration.

“Caleb, earth to Caleb.”

“Sorry, sorry...” he muttered, head shaking.

Nott dropped a basket of bread on the table – something leftover from Cad’s last baking endeavors. Caleb took a piece under Nott’s watchful eye and started pulling it to pieces with his hands.

“Caleb, you need to stop beating yourself up for this,” Nott sighed, “It’s just Fjord – he’ll be fine.”

Caleb raised an eyebrow at Nott.

Nott grumbled something that sounded like sarcasm as she pressed both hands into the table valiantly. Her eyes darted to her enlarged flask that was currently sitting next to the oven amongst a collection of other alcohol before she shook her head.

“I just mean that he’s been through worse at this point.” Nott mentioned, “and we always know what we’re walking into in a fight like this.”

Caleb was silent for a second as he caught his breath. “Yes… but usually, these ‘fights’ don’t feature me setting my family ablaze.”

He was choked up despite himself, which was odd because it was not something he expected. Rather the tears that were welling up seemed to surprise him beyond what he was expecting.

“I’m usually ready for it if it kills the monsters faster.”

Yasha wondered in, hair henshe damp likely from a bath of some kind as she popped into the chair, grabbing a loaf of bread herself and biting right into it. Yasha’s appetite was often something to behold after any sort of combat – and how fast their stores depleted was always a great reminder of her return.

Caleb tilted his head for a moment, caught up first by the floral scent that floated off Yasha, both distinct and familiar to the usual ozone smell that pushed through her.

“Yasha… you want me to blast powerful magic at things when you’re in the fray?”

She shrugged, “I can take it.”

“But you’re not Fjord!” Caleb snapped.

His wooden seat squeaked on the floor as he rose from the table. Nott winced at the noise as Yasha just looked up to him, a confused look on her brow as Caleb felt the room close in. Too many eyes, too many thoughts as fire crawled into the back of his mind, and he soon fled the scene even as Nott called after him.

“Oh…” Yasha stopped, “I... That was stupid. I should’ve been more sensitive.”

“I know it’s been a stressful day, but I don’t think I’ve seen Caleb this worked up before,” Nott scratched the back of her head as she started munching on the bread Caleb left behind.

When she said that, Yasha’s eyes widened, her gaze still tracing Caleb’s path up the stairs as realization clanged like a bell.

She blinked, “So that’s why.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Twitter: @plural_j


	3. Wisdom Versus Intelligence

The idea of anyone in his newfound group being destroyed by his magic was an absolute nightmare. Even the thought of him falling back into what he’d dropped with his old name made his whole body roil.

It took him one moment to slam the cover of his book shut before he started tearing out the pages. The letters mocked him. The secrets he’d spent time documenting were tiny claws from his past reaching out to try and pull him in again. He thought that, deep down, he’d know if he was being irrational, but that thought too was soon chased out of his head by a flash of bright light, and Fjord’s body vanishing from vision.

“Scheisse _!”_ He yelled across the room, a pillow from his bead thudding against the wall and flopping onto the ground moments later. His chest heaved, and hell the tears were flowing now. Everything washed away like a watercolor painting stared at for too long, or like staring through a window's glass into the rain as he fell to his knees.

He didn’t know how long he was like that, but he did reach a moment where it started to calm down. First was when his fingers started kneading through familiar fur, and the soft purring of his familiar tickled his ears, and the second was the other body leaning against his back, wrapped around him in an embrace.

He turned around, hands gently raised as he caught sight of curled blue horns, and Jester looked up at him from the embrace, eyes similarly tear-stained.

“Caleb… please, it’s okay,” she said, trying to laugh a little though it was beaten out by the sniffles, “It’s not your fault.”

“Jester…” Caleb paused.

She pulled herself up, wiping her eyes for a moment before she stood up, and proceeded to fall on Caleb’s bed with a groan.

“But- it was my- “

“No,” she said, raising her hand, “That man making that thing – that was his fault. Him getting angry at us… we all kind of did that but he was a dick, so he deserved it – but what happened after? That wasn’t your fault.”

Jester pulled herself up from the seated position, as she pulled a struggling weasel from around her neck and placed him on the floor, letting Sprinkle flee under the bed.

“It still doesn’t sit right.”

“Well, remember when we were in the happy fun ball and we saw that dragon, and everyone went for the exit, but they left me in there alone?”

Caleb paused for a moment and looked at her. Her face was notably less forlorn, even if that unaddressed pain still hung in the air. He nodded in response.

“That wasn’t our fault,” she shook her head, “but it happened. But we’re a family, right?”

“Right?”

“And sometimes we make mistakes and hurt each other. Or we’re Nott and we shoot Beau to win a competition.”

He snorted outright at that. While it was probably a problem that violence like that had become funny, he was starting to see what Jester was laying out.

“So, Caleb, please stop beating yourself up about it because none of us blame you. And Fjord definitely won’t blame you.” She patted his head affectionately and Caleb wondered if she kept enough joy for herself after pouring it out for everybody else.

“And we put sooo much time into healing him that he’s probably going to wake up very soon.”

Caleb stood up and wrapped her in a hug. Jester was surprised for a moment, but with a smile, she fell right into it as Frumpkin ran up her leg and settled between her horns. She giggled as they pulled apart again, Frumpkin flopping over on top of her so he was staring in her eyes before she picked him up and placed him back on the floor.

“Now, I’m going to get Sprinkle and we’re gonna go find something sweet.”

And she did just that, pulling the door closed behind her like the conversation never happened. Caleb took a deep breath, the ocean of guilt currently still as he walked over, fluffed out his pillow and put it back on his bed.

He looked around the empty room. Took in the details that barely made this place home for him as he realized suddenly that he’d forgotten to prepare his Alarm spell before coming in. Just another reminder of how comfortable this had all become for him.

Still, his brain was batting at him a little bit, tempting him to fall back into the pit of his despair while it had its hands in his brain.

But there was one thing he’d need to do if this was all to settle. He straightened his room, set his cloak and his books aside for a moment (then tucking them beneath his mattress because some habits never died) and headed back towards the door.

One more fire to put out if he was going to be able to sleep again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, logically it makes sense to release chapters one at a time to get more traction, but the story is best read as a whole and I don't want to do it the disservice of splitting it.
> 
> Twitter: @plural_j
> 
> And I welcome feedback for the most part, just be respectful!


	4. Milestone Leveling

It had to be late by the time Caleb made his way into Fjord’s room. His mind told him that they were nearing the evening even if outdoors did not guide the matter. He was certain for some of them it would have its effects, and he was ever thankful that they had places to go beyond the house if there was a desperate need for sunlight.

He took one last glance around the hall, then he ducked into the room, closing the door behind him quietly with one last breath.

It was dim in the room. Some of Caduceus’ light jars sat at precarious places within the room, providing a gentle greenish glow to the whole place as Caleb’s hands tightened and untightened. He reached for his book reflexively as his eyes squeezed shut for just a moment, but he couldn’t hold it off any longer.

At last, he let himself look to the bed, and he couldn’t help the breath of relief that filled his chest. Evidence of burnt and scorched skin was long gone, and the Fjord that he knew was back to his full stature, now laid out shirtless on his bed, eyes softly shut in a world of sleep.

Caleb leaned gently against the side of the bed like a curious pigeon. It felt like he was hovering over the bed – just barely out of fear of messing everything up, but soon he found subtlety a difficult feat.

Caleb caught sight of a familiar mark on Fjord’s chest. It appeared that someone had painted the old captain Tusktooth smirk right across his chest, and Caleb snorted despite himself. If anything, the fact that Fjord looked okay after all of this was a relief.

He found himself looking for any sense of scarring, any sense that he’d left any mark even if he knew – deep down he knew that it had all come from him, but the lack of marks one Fjord’s now-toned body settled some of the murkiness in his stomach. Beyond that, all he could do was watch. Carefully his eyes followed Fjord’s chest as it rose and fell, noticing the slicked-back hair that healed with the rest of him.

Then Fjord shifted in his sleep a little, and Caleb froze. His mind was anchored in the awkwardness of watching the man sleep post-serious injury as his for once his jittery hands found no need to pull him away. Fjord grunted a moment, and suddenly his eyes opened ever so slightly, caught in a fog of confusion as they finally settled on Caleb.

“Uh… hi,” Caleb’s tongue was dry, “I just. I-I just wanted to – “

Fjords lips pressed to his and arms wrapped around his shoulders. Caleb’s brain fired off thoughts rapid-fire until there were no other thoughts to think. His body collapsed into the kiss and into Fjord as tears sprung from his eyes. It was the storm that came to finally wash the tar from inside him, pushing the guilt away.

It had to be an eternity before they pulled away, Caleb’s internal clock be damned, and even after the kiss Fjord didn’t pull too far. His hand settled on Caleb’s shoulder as Caleb held it there, using the other to wipe tears from his face.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” Fjord whispered, like speaking too loudly would drive a needle into their safety balloon, “I just had a sudden thought- “

“I’m sorry, too,” Caleb muttered, “and I don’t mean to cut you off, but…”

Fjord stopped, biting his lip into a grin as his eyes never left Caleb, and Gods how they gnawed into Caleb’s being.

“I… was horrified. It was too late, and I let the moment get ahead of me.”

“Caleb, it killed the creature, did it not?”

“ _Ja,”_

“And we’re both still here, like this,” Fjord squeezed his shoulder.

Caleb nodded, and Fjord leaned in and kissed the bridge of his nose.

“Then it all turned out for the best.”

Caleb chuckled, a half-hearted sound as he couldn’t stop one final tear as the pad of Fjord’s thumb pushed it away.

“I really don’t think this is a good job long-term,” Caleb muttered, “else we’re going to let everyone get away with far too much.”

Fjord snorted, “I guess my self-preservation hasn’t proven itself to be the greatest these days.”

There was a graceful pause as the pair took a breath. The tension was swallowed by warmth as Fjord adjusted himself, still straining in places as freshly healed bones popped back into place and his whole body was stiffer than the straw mattress they sat upon.

But a moment later had Fjord seated with his back against the wall, and Caleb leaned with an ear against his chest and Fjord’s hands absently tracing his back.

“You were going to say something earlier,” Caleb whispered, “before I cut you off.”

“Oh,” Fjord smirked, “It was nothing.”

Caleb’s insight said otherwise.

“Bull, tell me.”

Fjord sighed and shifted ever so slightly so he could catch Caleb’s face a little better. In the greenish light of the jars, Caleb’s eyes were effervescent.

“I was just saying that I knew I had to kiss you now because the thought I wouldn’t be able to was suddenly the most devastating thing I’d ever heard.”

Caleb froze at that and Fjord pulled him into a tight embrace for a moment. A much-needed reassurance.

“And before you start blaming yourself again, I need you to remember that it was not too long ago that I was considering forcing us all to seek a world-eating sea serpent just so I could pretend to be someone I was not.”

Caleb pressed a kiss to Fjord’s jaw, then another to his mouth when he turned to reciprocate.

“Then, we can keep our promise,” Caleb whispered, “that we’ll keep each other from going off the deep end.”

“I can do that if you can do the same,” Fjord replied as his hand pushed through Caleb’s hair, and he held him there for just a little longer.

X X X X X X X X

Caduceus and Yasha were the first to know about it, mostly because there were no secrets you could say out loud that Caduceus wouldn’t hear, and Yasha because she was all too familiar with what that feeling felt like. Familiar like the prick of a flower’s thorn or an upset stomach after eating too much cake.

The rest started to put it together after a little while.

So, when they were in a similar situation again, and the horde of rust eaters that were after a nearby mine needed to be pushed away, the Nien managed to keep Fjord well away from the blast.

And when Fjord swept Caleb away for a kiss after that…

Well, it was out in the open at that point.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for coming along on the journey. Most critical role fic writing (and honestly most of why i write fic at all) is @lonelyjournalkeeper so I blame her for all this : P
> 
> Anyway, respectful feedback and critique is always welcome, and keep an eye on me on twitter - I might be finding ways to post more original content soon. Cheers.
> 
> Twitter: @plural_j


End file.
